Just when you think you have it all worked out.
Let me start by saying this: I am so happy with being alive. However crazy my story seems, however many twists and turns along the road, I know that its all worth it. I know that family matters to me, and being around Jaime has made me face the facts-
I was nowhere near fatherhood before this happened to me. I mean sure, in a vague sense I figured it would happen, but I never imagined myself with a baby. I didn’t prepare for it at all financially. Sorta figured that if thats what fate wanted to happen, then thats how it would happen.
A few tips for new dads:
- Don’t overthink it.
- Babies are people, men are people. although it may FEEL like it, a baby is not an alien or a hairless gerbils. There will be mutual understanding. It’ll he hard sometimes but mostly it will feel positive, so just be in the moment.
- Remember how fast time goes.
- Ok, so this is one thing you don’t want to under think. When I’m questioning my masculinity as I rock Jaime to soothing music, I remember how fast the past five years have gone. What have I really done for the past five years? I ran a successful website, I formed some friendships… but it really went by like a blur.
The next five years will be the same.
- Your baby will be a kid in five years. FIVE YEARS. How old are you, guy who’s reading this? 25? 40? 50? Now think of five years. What I’m getting at is, your baby will only be a baby a very short time. Then they’ll be a regular-type human being who doesn’t look like ripe little peach or a squishy little bear. They’ll talk and go to school and have playdates and jobs. Knowing this helps even the most tired, poop-smelling moments just a little bit sweeter.
- Ask for help. People feel good when they help you, so by asking for friends to step up and do you a solid, you’re actually doing them one, too. People especially like helping when cute little babies are involved. Added perk: Babies, including Jaime, instinctually are extra cute with new people. Somewhere deep in their baby brain, they know that they need to live and they do that by being effing adorable. This means less crying and squirming when they’re fed, clean, held and otherwise have no reason to be crying except to exercise their little larynxes (lari?) So you get help and have time to pay your bills and read and go for a run, baby is happy, friend feels like part of the family. ALL GOOD FEELS.